We interrupt this busy work day for an important announcement: a critique of my novel opening is up at Flogging the Quill. For those of you who aren't familar with that blog, the author who runs it looks at the first sixteen lines of your novel (essentially the first page) and offers his opinion as to whether it has enough tension to make him turn the page.
So, did he?
He said it was close, though. He wasn't fazed by my mention of two universes in the second line, but he did suggest I could cut some lines of dialogue and get straight to the problem (Paul's mom being sick). I think that's a good suggestion and will use it in the rewrite.
Feel free to look at his critique and add your own comments. I'll post my "Work in Progess Wednesday" entry tonight. Now, I have to get back to my experiments.